100+ Jokes with a twist that will crack you up

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Have you ever heard a joke and then laughed, only to be told the punchline and realize that the joke was actually quite clever? If you enjoy this type of humour, then you will love jokes with a twist. Jokes with a twist are cleverly written so that the punchline is not revealed until the very end. This type of humour can be enjoyed by people of all ages and is a great way to get a laugh out of your friends and family.

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Jokes with a twist  

What did Oliver Twist order at the Indian restaurant?

Please, can I have samosa?

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What’s the difference between kinky & perverted & twisted?

Kinky’s using a feather. Perverted’s using the whole chicken & twisted’s using the whole farm

 

Today, a man twisted my ear, put a blade to my neck and, at end, asked for money.

Fucking Barber.

 

How many twists does it take to screw in a Sid Meier’s light bulb?

Just one more turn.

 

Roll, roll, roll your joint, twist it at the end

Spark it up, take a drag and pass it to… myself I guess. Sorry, social distancing and all, roll your own.

 

A Pavlovian Twist

The ultimate Pavlovian twist is that whenever you hear the name Pavlov you think of a dog

 

In breaking news, Trump’s personal library has burned down.

The fire consumed both books and in a tragic twist he hadn’t even finished coloring the second one.

 

I don’t like Haikus; But I like ironic twists

I am conflicted

 

I have fetish for twisting up water hoses

Some would call it a kink

 

Did you hear Twisted Sister performed for the “Geologist of the Year” award ceremony?

They played “I Won A Rock!”

 

World tounge-twisting champion was just arrested.

It is expected that he will be given a really tough sentence.

 

Another bar joke but with a twist

A dyslexic guy walks into a bra

 

I don’t have a carbon footprint.

I just drive everywhere.

 

Long jokes with a twist

The most corrupt CEOs are those of the pretzel companies.

They’re always so twisted.

 

When we were kids, we used to be afraid of the dark.

But when we grew up, the electricity bill made us afraid of the light!

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What did the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs say?

“T. rex, I’m coming for my hug!”

 

An apple a day keeps the doctor away…

Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.

 

I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just a kid.

 

I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home.

So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

 

 I was playing chess with my friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting.”

So we stopped playing chess.

 

Why did Mozart hate all of his chickens?

When he asked them who the best composer was, they all replied, “Bach, Bach, Bach.”

 

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick.

She still isn’t talking to me.

 

Patient: Oh doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation.

Doctor: Don’t worry. Mine too.

 

I just got my doctor’s test results and I’m really upset. Turns out, I’m not gonna be a doctor.

 

Never break someone’s heart. They only have one.

Break their bones instead. They have 206 of them.

 

My husband is mad that I have no sense of direction.

So I packed up my stuff and right.

 

Short jokes with a twist

I childproofed my house

Somehow they still got in!

 

The guy who stole my diary just died.

My thoughts are with his family.

 

What’s worse than biting into an apple and discovering a worm?

Biting into an apple and discovering half a worm.

 

As I get older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.

 

My wife told me she’ll slam my head into the keyboard if I don’t get off the computer.

I’m not too worried — I think she’s jokindkdkslalkdlkfjslfjslksdlkfjuahehwhgwdklaljdf

 

You’re not completely useless.

You can always serve as a bad example.

 

A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree. “You can’t cut me down,” the tree complains. “I’m a talking tree!” The man responds, “You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue.”

 

What’s a pirate’s favorite letter of the alphabet?

None. Historians have suggested most pirates would have been illiterate.

 

“Welcome back to Plastic Surgery Anonymous. Nice to see so many new faces here today!”

 

 My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working.” I’m not sure what she’s talking about.

I opened the fridge door and it’s working fine!

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What’s the last thing to go through a fly’s head as it hits the windshield of a car going 70 miles per hour?

Its butt.

 

Funny jokes with a twist

 

My boss told me to have a good day.

So, I went home.

 

A child determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, “That’s arson.”

 

Imagine when you walked into a bar and there was a lengthy line of individuals ready to take a swing at you. That’s the punch line.

 

Wife: “I want another baby.”
Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one.”

 

“What’s your name, son?”

The principal asked his student. The kid replied, “D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir.” “Do you have a stutter?” the principal asked. The student answered, “No sir, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk.”

My favorite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.

 

Why are friends a lot like snow?

If you pee on them, they disappear.

 

I threw a boomerang a few years ago.

I now live in constant fear.

 

A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either terrible news or great news.

 

When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic.

I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.

 

Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?

Because they have no body to go with.

 

My boss said to me, “You’re the worst train driver ever. How many have you derailed this year?”

I said, “I’m not sure; it’s hard to keep track.”

 

My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

 

You know you’re not liked when you get handed the camera every time they take a group photo.

Conclusion Of Jokes with Twist

In conclusion, jokes with a twist can be funny and clever. They can also be used to make a point or teach a lesson. When telling a jokes with a twist, be sure to pay attention to your audience and their reaction. With a little practice, you can master the art of the joke with a twist.

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