70 Boat Jokes, Puns and One-liners to Crack You Up 😀

Are you looking to add a little lightheartedness and laughter to your day? Look no further than these 70 hilarious Boat jokes and puns! 

From one liners to clever puns, these funny Boat jokes are sure to get a chuckle from everyone.

Regardless of your age or sense of humor, these funny Boat jokes will surely get everyone giggling. So why not pass some time with these hilarious Boat jokes and puns?

Let’s get started!

Boat Jokes

1. Why did the sailor bring a ladder on his boat? So he could climb aboard!
2. What did the boat say to the wave? Nothing, it just waved back!
3. Why did the boat go to the gym? To get more fit in the keel!
4. What did the pirate say when he turned 80 years old? “Aye, matey! I’m an octogenarian now!”
5. Why did the boat owner decide to sell his vessel? He was tired of being anchored down.
6. What’s the best day to go out on a boat? Sails-day!
7. What did the grape say when it got stepped on in a boat? “Nothing, it just let out a little wine.”
8. Why did the sailor take a bar of soap with him on his boat? To wash up on shore!
9. What do you call a boat that’s afraid of the water? A rowboat!
10. Why did the boat have a hard time passing its exams? It kept getting a sea-minus!
11. What do you call a boat that’s always ready to party? A buoy-sterous vessel!
12. Why did the boat break up with the pier? It just wasn’t working out.
13. Why did the boat refuse to be painted? It didn’t want to be marred.
14. What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a trampoline and a well-dressed man on a boat? Attire!

Boat Jokes for Kids

1. Why did the sailor refuse to eat fruit on his boat? He didn’t want to get scurvy.
2. What did the boat say when it got a hole in it? “SOS, I’m sinking!”
3. Why did the boat go to the doctor? It was feeling a little queasy.
4. What do you call a boat that’s been stolen? A row-boat!
5. Why did the boat captain get lost in the fog? He mist the signs.
6. What do you call a boat that never stops talking? A chatterboat!
7. Why did the sailor refuse to lend money to his friend? He was afraid he’d be taken for a ride.
8. What do you call a boat that’s not seaworthy? A sinking feeling.
9. Why did the boat captain get a ticket? He was caught speeding on the water.
10. What do you call a boat that’s always late? A sloopsie-daisy!
11. Why did the boat owner get mad at the seagulls? They kept making off with his ship-shape snacks.
12. What do you call a boat that’s afraid of the dark? A lantern ship.
13. Why did the sailor go to the gym? To work on his abs-ailing skills.
14. What do you call a boat that can’t stay afloat? A flotation device.

Funny Boat Jokes

1. Why did the boat refuse to go into the water? It was shore-ly scared.
2. What do you call a boat that’s always on vacation? A cruise-matic vessel!
3. Why did the sailor get a tattoo of a compass on his arm? So he could find his way back to port!
4. What do you call a boat that’s always telling jokes? A laugh-boat!
5. Why did the boat refuse to race against the motorboat? It was afraid of being out-propelled.
6. What did the boat say to the dock when it bumped into it? “Oh buoy, that was a dock-tastrophe!”
7. Why did the boat captain buy a parrot? To help with the anchor management.
8. What do you call a boat that’s always happy? A jolly boat!
9. Why did the sailor get lost in the bay? He didn’t have a compass-ionate guide.
10. What do you call a boat that’s always telling the truth? A truth-ferry!
11. Why did the boat refuse to swim in the lake? It was afraid of catching a fin-fraction.
12. What did the sailor say when his boat capsized? “I’m in deep water now!”
13. Why did the boat owner get a ticket from the coast guard? He was caught without his sea-tbelt.
14. What do you call a boat that’s always trying to be the center of attention? An egotis-tug!

Boat Jokes One-liners

1. Why did the boat refuse to go near the lighthouse? It was afraid of being blinded by the light.
2. What do you call a boat that’s always in a hurry? A speed-yacht!
3. Why did the sailor bring a pillow on his boat? So he could take a nap-tain.
4. What do you call a boat that’s always worrying about the weather? A fret-boat!
5. Why did the boat captain buy a new watch? To keep tide of the time.
6. What do you call a boat that’s always making excuses? A justi-ferry!
7. Why did the boat refuse to go near the whirlpool? It was afraid of being taken for a spin.
8. What did the sailor say when his boat hit a rock? “Oh ship!”
9. Why did the boat owner get a new pair of shoes? To deck out his vessel.
10. What do you call a boat that’s always cold? A chill-boat!
11. Why did the sailor refuse to play cards on his boat? He was afraid of a deck collision.
12. What do you call a boat that’s always drinking coffee? A brew-boat!
13. Why did the boat captain decide to retire? He wanted to sail into the sunset.
14. What do you call a boat that’s always singing? A melodious vessel!

Boat Jokes and Puns

1. Why did the boat refuse to go near the waterfall? It was afraid of falling overboard.
2. What did the sailor say when his boat was stolen? “Abandon ship!”
3. Why did the boat owner get a new dog? To help him with the anchor retriever.
4. What do you call a boat that’s always trying to impress others? A showboat!
5. Why did the sailor refuse to bring his guitar on his boat? He was afraid of hitting a wrong note and causing a ship-wreck.
6. What do you call a boat that’s always arguing? A dispute-ship!
7. Why did the boat refuse to go near the reef? It was afraid of getting coral-ed.
8. What did the sailor say when his boat was running low on gas? “I’m running on fumes!”
9. Why did the boat captain get a new hat? To keep his head above water.
10. What do you call a boat that’s always hungry? A famish-boat!
11. What did the boat say to the other boat in the parking lot? “Nice pier-ing job!”
12. Why did the sailor get a new pair of binoculars? To keep an eye on the horizon.
13. What do you call a boat that’s always trying to be trendy? A fad-boat!
14. Why did the boat refuse to go near the bridge? It was afraid of getting bridged.

Final Take Away from these Funny Boat Jokes

The above 70 hilarious Boat jokes and puns are sure to make any gathering of friends, family members, or colleagues erupt with laughter.

I am sure these jokes and puns must have lightened your mood and also have brought some humor to your life.

Also don’t forget to check our other list of jokes.