70 Bread Jokes, Puns and One-liners to Crack You Up 😀

Are you looking to add a little lightheartedness and laughter to your day? Look no further than these 70 hilarious Bread jokes and puns! 

From one liners to clever puns, these funny Bread jokes are sure to get a chuckle from everyone.

Regardless of your age or sense of humor, these funny Bread jokes will surely get everyone giggling. So why not pass some time with these hilarious Bread jokes and puns?

Let’s get started!

Bread Jokes

1. What do you call bread that’s afraid of the toaster? Chicken Loaf!
2. Why was the bread always tired? Because it kneaded itself to sleep!
3. What do you get when you cross bread with an octopus? A breaded calamari!
4. What do you call a snake that’s made of bread? A Pythloaf!
5. Why did the loaf of bread go to the doctor? Because it felt crumby!
6. What did the slice of bread say to the loaf of bread? “You’re toast!”
7. Why did the baker go to therapy? He kneaded someone to talk to!
8. What do you call a person who can’t stop making bread puns? A gluten for punishment!
9. What do you get when you cross a breadstick with a croissant? A French stick!
10. Why did the bread go to school? To get butter grades!
11. What do you call bread that has been attacked by a werewolf? Loaf of bread gone bad!
12. Why did the piece of bread break up with the toaster? It just wasn’t their jam anymore.
13. What do you call a bread that’s really good at math? Wheat Calculus!
14. Why did the bread file a police report? It was assaulted with butter!

Bread Jokes for Kids

1. What do you call a loaf of bread that flies? A plain bagel!
2. Why did the baker go to jail? He got caught using sourdough starter to make counterfeit money!
3. What do you get when you cross a bread roll with a turkey? A breaded turkey roll!
4. What did the piece of bread say to the butter? “You’re on a roll!”
5. Why did the loaf of bread break up with the bag of flour? They just didn’t rise to the occasion.
6. What do you call a slice of bread that can play guitar? Jimi Hendough!
7. Why did the bread go to the doctor? It was feeling a bit crusty!
8. What do you call a bread that can dance? A bun shaker!
9. Why did the bread go to outer space? To become an astroloafer!
10. What do you call a bread that’s always watching you? A loaf stalker!
11. Why did the bread cross the road? To get to the gluten-free bakery!
12. What do you get when you cross a bread roll with a pizza? A pizza roll!
13. Why did the bread break up with the cream cheese? They just didn’t spread the same way anymore.
14. What do you call bread that’s always on time? Punctual loaf!

Funny Bread Jokes

1. Why did the bread go to the beach? To get a tan-dough!
2. What do you call a loaf of bread that’s been cursed? Sourdough-doo!
3. Why did the bread go to the bar? To get toasted!
4. What do you get when you cross a bread roll with a hot dog? A hot dog bun!
5. Why did the bread go to space? To see if there’s life on other loaf planets!
6. What do you call a slice of bread that’s always grumpy? A sourdoughpuss!
7. Why did the bread break up with the peanut butter? It was just too nutty!
8. What do you call bread that’s scared of water? A loaf preserver!
9. Why did the bread go to the dentist? It had a crust-ache!
10. What do you get when you cross a bagel with a porcupine? A lox-covered hedgehog!
11. Why did the loaf of bread break up with the toaster? It was tired of being toasted all the time!
12. What do you call bread that’s obsessed with bodybuilding? Gluten gains!
13. Why did the bread go to the party? To loaf around!

Bread Jokes One-liners

1. What do you get when you cross bread with a bear? A honey whole wheat!
2. Why did the bread take a vacation? To relax and loaf around!
3. What do you call bread that’s been hypnotized? Rye bread!
4. Why did the bread get into a fight with the jam? It didn’t want to be spread too thin!
5. What do you get when you cross a bagel with a clock? A time doughnut!
6. Why did the bread go to the gym? To get a gluten-free workout!
7. What do you call bread that’s always bragging? A sourdough!
8. Why did the bread go to the cinema? To watch the crust in peace!
9. What do you call bread that’s always running away? A loaf of absconding bread!
10. Why did the bread go to the doctor? It was feeling a bit stale!
11. What do you get when you cross a bread roll with a hamburger? A burger bun!
12. Why did the bread go on a date with the butter? To see if they were a good match!
13. What do you call bread that’s been to the gym? Muscle crumb!
14. Why did the bread go to the opera? To hear some dough-re-mi!

Bread Jokes and Puns

1. What do you get when you cross a bagel with a rabbit? A bagebit!
2. Why did the bread take up yoga? To get in touch with its inner gluten!
3. What do you call a loaf of bread that’s always telling jokes? A yeast infection!
4. Why did the bread break up with the jelly? It was just too clingy!
5. What do you get when you cross a croissant with a muffin? A cruffin!
6. Why did the bread go to the spa? To get a yeast infection!
7. What do you call bread that’s been to the beach? Sandy dough!
8. Why did the bread go to the gym? To work on its gluten-free gains!
9. What do you get when you cross a bagel with a bird? A seed-covered birdie roll!
10. Why did the bread go to the museum? To learn about its loafer ancestors!
11. What do you call a slice of bread that’s always causing trouble? A bad seed!
12. Why did the bread go to the doctor? It had a yeast infection!
13. What do you get when you cross a croissant with a bagel? A crogel!
14. Why did the bread go to the music festival? To see all the jam bands!

Final Take Away from these Funny Bread Jokes

The above 70 hilarious Bread jokes and puns are sure to make any gathering of friends, family members, or colleagues erupt with laughter.

I am sure these jokes and puns must have lightened your mood and also have brought some humor to your life.

Also don’t forget to check our other list of jokes.