70 Nurse Jokes, Puns and One-liners to Crack You Up 😀

Are you looking to add a little lightheartedness and laughter to your day? Look no further than these 70 hilarious Nurse jokes and puns! 

From one liners to clever puns, these funny Nurse jokes are sure to get a chuckle from everyone.

Regardless of your age or sense of humor, these funny Nurse jokes will surely get everyone giggling. So why not pass some time with these hilarious Nurse jokes and puns?

Let’s get started!

Nurse Jokes

1. Why did the nurse cross the road? To get to the patient on the other side!
2. What do you call a nurse with a cold? A coughy nurse!
3. How do nurses communicate with each other? They use chart-topping hits – it’s all about their notes!
4. What do you call a nurse who works only at night? A nightingale!
5. Why did the nurse go to art school? To learn how to draw blood!
6. What do you call a nurse who works in a bank? A blood bank nurse!
7. Why did the nurse go to a seance? To contact the patient who had just passed away!
8. What do you call a nurse who works in a funeral home? A dead nurse!
9. Why did the nurse take up knitting? To mend broken hearts!
10. What do you call a nurse who is always tired? A nap-rus!
11. Why did the nurse take a red pen to work? To draw blood!
12. What do you call a nurse who can’t find a vein? Needle-less!
13. Why did the nurse have a toothbrush in her pocket? To brush up on her skills!
14. What do you call a nurse who loves the outdoors? A nature nurse!

Nurse Jokes for Kids

1. Why did the nurse bring a ladder to work? To reach the highest levels of care!
2. What do you call a nurse who works in a library? A check-up librarian!
3. Why did the nurse go to the beach? To check out the patient in the sand!
4. What do you call a nurse who loves to dance? A tango-tastic nurse!
5. Why did the nurse wear sunglasses to work? To keep an eye on patients!
6. What do you call a nurse who is always on time? A punctual nurse!
7. Why did the nurse go to the pet store? To check on the sick puppy!
8. What do you call a nurse who loves to bake? A sugar-nurse!
9. Why did the nurse go to the bank? To withdraw some blood pressure!
10. What do you call a nurse who loves sports? A sports medicine nurse!
11. Why did the nurse bring a camera to work? To take a shot of the patient’s recovery!
12. What do you call a nurse who is always happy? A cheerful nurse!
13. Why did the nurse go to the hardware store? To get some tools for surgical repairs!
14. What do you call a nurse who loves to sing? A vocal nurse!

Funny Nurse Jokes

1. Why did the nurse take up rock climbing? To reach new heights in patient care!
2. What do you call a nurse who is always calm under pressure? A cool-headed nurse!
3. Why did the nurse bring a map to work? To navigate the patient’s journey to recovery!
4. What do you call a nurse who loves to travel? A globetrotting nurse!
5. Why did the nurse go to the amusement park? To check on the patient who got sick on the roller coaster!
6. What do you call a nurse who loves to fish? A fisherman’s friend nurse!
7. Why did the nurse bring a calculator to work? To keep track of the patient’s vital signs!
8. What do you call a nurse who loves to write? A scribe-nurse!
9. Why did the nurse go to the gym? To work on their bedside manner!
10. What do you call a nurse who always wears a cape? A super-nurse!
11. Why did the nurse go to the theater? To check on the patient who fainted during the play!
12. What do you call a nurse who loves to garden? A plant nurse!
13. Why did the nurse bring a calculator to work? To keep track of the patient’s medications!
14. What do you call a nurse who is always telling jokes? A laugh-a-minute nurse!

Nurse Jokes One-liners

1. Why did the nurse go to the zoo? To check on the patient who got bit by a monkey!
2. What do you call a nurse who loves to cook? A culinary nurse!
3. Why did the nurse bring a flashlight to work? To shine a light on the patient’s condition!
4. What do you call a nurse who loves to read? A bookworm nurse!
5. Why did the nurse go to the store? To buy some supplies for wound care!
6. What do you call a nurse who is always multitasking? A jack-of-all-trades nurse!
7. Why did the nurse bring a magnifying glass to work? To get a closer look at the patient’s symptoms!
8. What do you call a nurse who loves to paint? An artistic nurse!
9. Why did the nurse go to the circus? To check on the patient who got trampled by an elephant!
10. What do you call a nurse who is always organized? A neat freak nurse!
11. Why did the nurse bring a stethoscope to the beach? To listen to the sound of the patient’s heart rate!
12. What do you call a nurse who loves to knit? A knitting nurse!
13. Why did the nurse go to the garage? To check on the patient who got hit by a car!
14. What do you call a nurse who is always prepared? A Boy Scout nurse!

Nurse Jokes and Puns

37. Why did the nurse bring a camera to the park? To take pictures of the patient’s progress during physical therapy!
38. What do you call a nurse who loves to sing in the shower? A bathroom singer nurse!
39. Why did the nurse go to the supermarket? To buy some healthy food for the patient!
40. What do you call a nurse who is always positive? An optimist nurse!
41. Why did the nurse bring a compass to work? To find the right direction for patient care!
42. What do you call a nurse who loves to play video games? A gamer nurse!
43. Why did the nurse go to the concert? To check on the patient who got hurt in the mosh pit!
44. What do you call a nurse who is always learning? A lifelong learner nurse!
45. Why did the nurse bring a tissue box to work? To comfort the patient during difficult times!
46. What do you call a nurse who loves to hike? A trailblazing nurse!
47. Why did the nurse go to the beach? To check on the patient who got stung by a jellyfish!
48. What do you call a nurse who is always available? A 24/7 nurse!
49. Why did the nurse bring a ruler to work? To measure the progress of the patient’s healing!
50. What do you call a nurse who loves to dance in the rain? A A rain-dancing nurse!

Final Take Away from these Funny Nurse Jokes

The above 70 hilarious Nurse jokes and puns are sure to make any gathering of friends, family members, or colleagues erupt with laughter.

I am sure these jokes and puns must have lightened your mood and also have brought some humor to your life.

Also don’t forget to check our other list of jokes.