70 Shrek Jokes, Puns and One-liners to Crack You Up 😀

Are you looking to add a little lightheartedness and laughter to your day? Look no further than these 70 hilarious Shrek jokes and puns! 

From one liners to clever puns, these funny Shrek jokes are sure to get a chuckle from everyone.

Regardless of your age or sense of humor, these funny Shrek jokes will surely get everyone giggling. So why not pass some time with these hilarious Shrek jokes and puns?

Let’s get started!

Shrek Jokes

1. Why did Shrek go to art school? To learn how to draw Fiona.
2. What did Shrek say when Donkey asked why he was wearing green clothes? “It’s not easy being green.”
3. What did Shrek say when Donkey asked why he lived in a swamp? “I’m a simple ogre with simple needs.”
4. What did Shrek say when he met the Fairy Godmother for the first time? “Who are you calling an ogre?!”
5. Why did Shrek refuse to eat the gingerbread man? He didn’t want to bite off more than he could chew.
6. What did Shrek say when he saw the dragon for the first time? “Looks like I found my match.”
7. Why did Shrek go to the gym? To work on his roar-cise.
8. What did Shrek say when Donkey asked why he didn’t like being around people? “People are like onions. They have layers, and they make me cry.”
9. What did Shrek say when he saw the three little pigs building their houses? “Hey, that’s my line!”
10. Why did Shrek become a chef? He was tired of living on a diet of swamp weeds.
11. What did Shrek say when he saw Pinocchio’s nose growing? “I know when someone’s lying, and you’re not good at it.”
12. Why did Shrek start a rock band? He wanted to show everyone that ogres can rock.
13. What did Shrek say when he met Lord Farquaad? “You’re compensating for something, aren’t you?”
14. Why did Shrek go to therapy? He had some issues he needed to work out.

Shrek Jokes for Kids

1. What did Shrek say when he found out he was going to be a father? “Looks like I’m going to need a bigger swamp.”
2. Why did Shrek decide to build a house? He was tired of sleeping in a swamp.
3. What did Shrek say when he saw Puss in Boots for the first time? “Who brought their pet to a fight?”
4. Why did Shrek go on a diet? He wanted to look his best for Fiona.
5. What did Shrek say when he saw the Pied Piper playing his flute? “That guy really knows how to get rats moving.”
6. Why did Shrek go to the library? He wanted to read up on his fairy tales.
7. What did Shrek say when he saw the Gingerbread Man with a broken leg? “Looks like he couldn’t run, run, as fast as he could.”
8. Why did Shrek start a garden? He wanted to grow some onions.
9. What did Shrek say when he saw the Magic Mirror for the first time? “Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the most handsome ogre of them all?”
10. Why did Shrek take up yoga? He wanted to be more flexible for his swamp activities.
11. What did Shrek say when he met the Ugly Stepsister? “Looks like you’ve got some competition in the ugly department.”
12. Why did Shrek go on a vacation? He needed to get away from the swamp for a little while.
13. What did Shrek say when he saw the Big Bad Wolf? “Hey, I recognize that guy. We went to the same anger management class.”
14. Why did Shrek start a food truck? He wanted to bring his love of onions to the masses.

Funny Shrek Jokes

1. What did Shrek say when he met the Fairy Godmother again? “You shall not pass!” (in his best Gandalf impression)
2. Why did Shrek become a detective? He wanted to solve the mystery of who stole his swamp weed.
3. What did Shrek say when he saw the Three Blind Mice? “Looks like you guys need some glasses.”
4. Why did Shrek start a comedy club? He wanted to prove that ogres have a sense of humor.
5. What did Shrek say when he saw the Magic Mirror showing him his reflection? “Well, at least I’m not as ugly as Lord Farquaad.”
6. Why did Shrek take up painting? He wanted to capture the beauty of his swamp.
7. What did Shrek say when he saw the Knights attacking him and Donkey? “I guess they didn’t get the memo that ogres are tough to defeat.”
8. Why did Shrek start a dance club? He wanted to show off his smooth moves.
9. What did Shrek say when he met the Muffin Man? “Hey, I’ve heard about your delicious gingerbread. Can I get a sample?”
10. Why did Shrek go to a spa? He needed some relaxation after a long day of scaring people.
11. What did Shrek say when he saw the Fairy Godmother’s potion factory? “Looks like she’s brewing up trouble.”
12. Why did Shrek start a farm? He wanted to have a steady supply of onions.
13. What did Shrek say when he met the Pied Piper again? “I see you’re still luring rats around with your tunes.”
14. Why did Shrek start a book club? He wanted to discuss his favorite fairy tales with other ogres.

Shrek Jokes One-liners

1. What did Shrek say when he saw the Dragon again? “Looks like we’re going to have to make nice this time.”
2. Why did Shrek start a hair salon? He wanted to show that ogres can have great hair too.
3. What did Shrek say when he met the Golden Goose? “I hope you’re laying golden onions instead of eggs.”
4. Why did Shrek start a radio station? He wanted to share his love of swamp music with the world.
5. What did Shrek say when he saw the Fairy Godmother’s wand? “Looks like we’re going to have to take that thing away from her.”
6. Why did Shrek start a toy store? He wanted to sell plush versions of himself and his friends.
7. What did Shrek say when he met the Magic Mirror again? “Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the strongest ogre of them all?”
8. Why did Shrek start a fashion line? He wanted to create clothes that fit his ogre physique.
9. What did Shrek say when he saw the Gingerbread Man again? “Looks like you’ve still got some fight left in you.”
10. Why did Shrek start a cooking show? He wanted to share his favorite onion recipes with the world.
11. What did Shrek say when he met the Fairy Godmother’s son, Prince Charming? “I hope you’re more charming than your mother.”
12. Why did Shrek start a fitness program? He wanted to show that ogres can be fit and healthy too.
13. What did Shrek say when he saw the Big Bad Wolf dressed as Grandma? “Looks like someone’s been raiding the costume shop again.”
14. Why did Shrek start a car dealership? He wanted to sell cars that could handle the rough terrain of the swamp.

Shrek Jokes and Puns

1. What did Shrek say when he met the Fairy Godmother’s accomplice, Thelonious? “Looks like you could use a shower.”
2. Why did Shrek start a charity? He wanted to help other misunderstood creatures like himself.
3. What did Shrek say when he saw the Fairy Godmother’s factory in flames? “Looks like her plans went up in smoke.”
4. Why did Shrek start a pet adoption center? He wanted to help find homes for abandoned creatures in the swamp.
5. What did Shrek say when he saw the Magic Mirror showing Lord Farquaad’s ghost? “Looks like someone forgot to move on to the other side.”
6. Why did Shrek start a beauty pageant? He wanted to show that beauty comes in all shapes and sizes, even ogre-sized.
7. What did Shrek say when he met the Ugly Stepsister again? “Looks like you could use some fairy godmother magic yourself.”
8. Why did Shrek start a film studio? He wanted to create movies that showcased ogre culture and history.
9. What did Shrek say when he saw the Fairy Godmother’s plan to marry Fiona to Prince Charming? “Looks like we’ll have to crash this wedding too.”
10. Why did Shrek start a sports team? He wanted to show that ogres can be great athletes too.
11. What did Shrek say when he met the Golden Goose’s keeper, Monsieur Hood? “Looks like you’re taking this ‘rob from the rich’ thing too far.”
12. Why did Shrek start a theme park? He wanted to create a place where ogres could have fun too.
13. What did Shrek say when he saw the Fairy Godmother’s magic potion cookbook? “Looks like she could use some new recipes.”
14. Why did Shrek start a theater group? He wanted to put on plays that showcased the talents of ogre actors.

 

Final Take Away from these Funny Shrek Jokes

The above 70 hilarious Shrek jokes and puns are sure to make any gathering of friends, family members, or colleagues erupt with laughter.

I am sure these jokes and puns must have lightened your mood and also have brought some humor to your life.

Also don’t forget to check our other list of jokes.