70 Wood Jokes, Puns and One-liners to Crack You Up 😀

Are you looking to add a little lightheartedness and laughter to your day? Look no further than these 70 hilarious Wood jokes and puns! 

From one liners to clever puns, these funny Wood jokes are sure to get a chuckle from everyone.

Regardless of your age or sense of humor, these funny Wood jokes will surely get everyone giggling. So why not pass some time with these hilarious Wood jokes and puns?

Let’s get started!

Wood Jokes

1. Why did the lumberjack break up with his girlfriend? Because he saw someone else and he just couldn’t leaf her.
2. What do you call a tree that’s good at bowling? A spare wood.
3. Why did the wooden beam go to the doctor? Because it was feeling a little plank.
4. What do you call a tree that has been knighted? Sir-Vivor.
5. Why did the wooden horse go on a diet? He wanted to be a little whinny.
6. What do you call a wooden car with a wooden engine? A wooden go-kart.
7. Why did the tree go to the dentist? To get its roots cleaned.
8. What do you call a wooden vegetable? A carrot.
9. Why did the tree go to the gym? To get trunk.
10. What do you call a tree that plays jazz? A saxa-phone.
11. Why did the wooden chair go to the psychiatrist? Because it had a lot of seating issues.
12. What do you call a tree that’s been to outer space? Astro-lodge.
13. Why did the tree fail his driving test? It kept branching out.
14. What do you call a group of trees that sing together? A forest choir.

Wood Jokes for Kids

1. Why did the wooden spoon break up with the fork? Because the fork was too sharp-tongued.
2. What do you call a tree that’s always ready to fight? A chopper.
3. Why did the wooden robot go on a diet? It wanted to be a slim-plywood.
4. What do you call a tree that’s good at math? An arborithmatician.
5. Why did the wooden clock go to the principal’s office? For tocking too much.
6. What do you call a tree that’s not afraid to stand out? A rebel-leaf.
7. Why did the wooden table go to the doctor? Because it had a lot of splinters.
8. What do you call a tree that’s always at the front of the line? A lead-oak.
9. Why did the wooden ruler break up with the pencil? Because the pencil was always sharp.
10. What do you call a tree that’s always playing pranks? A joak-tree.
11. Why did the wooden chair go to the bar? To get a leg up on the competition.
12. What do you call a tree that’s always been lucky? Four-leaf-clover.
13. Why did the wooden airplane break up with the wooden helicopter? It was a propeller misunderstanding.
14. What do you call a tree that’s always got your back? A support-oak.

Funny Wood Jokes

1. Why did the wooden horse go to the doctor? It was feeling a little “neigh-sick.”
2. What do you call a tree that’s always ready to party? A limbo-log.
3. Why did the wooden violin break up with the wooden guitar? Because the guitar was always picking on it.
4. What do you call a tree that’s always telling jokes? A comed-wood.
5. Why did the wooden chair go to the beach? To catch some rays.
6. What do you call a tree that’s always studying? A book-wormwood.
7. Why did the wooden computer break up with the wooden tablet? It had too many bugs.
8. What do you call a tree that’s always wearing a suit and tie? A board member.
9. Why did the wooden boat go to the gym? To get shipshape.
10. What do you call a tree that’s always in a rush? A hasty spruce.
11. Why did the wooden pencil break up with the pen? Because the pen had too much ink in its veins.
12. What do you call a tree that’s always happy? A sappy tree.
13. Why did the wooden basketball go to the therapist? It had some dribbling issues.
14. What do you call a tree that’s always wearing shades? A cool tree.

Wood Jokes One-liners

1. Why did the wooden door break up with the window? Because the window was too transparent.
2. What do you call a tree that’s always got your back in a fight? A battle oak.
3. Why did the wooden bird go to the hospital? It had a wood pecker.
4. What do you call a tree that’s always texting? A tweet-oak.
5. Why did the wooden monkey break up with the wooden gorilla? Because the gorilla was too dominant.
6. What do you call a tree that’s always sad? A weeping willow.
7. Why did the wooden computer go to the beach? To surf the web.
8. What do you call a tree that’s always stylish? A fashionable fir.
9. Why did the wooden table break up with the wooden chair? Because the chair couldn’t seat it.
10. What do you call a tree that’s always singing? A melodious maple.
11. Why did the wooden guitar go to the hospital? It had some fretting issues.
12. What do you call a tree that’s always winning? A champ-oak.
13. Why did the wooden car break up with the wooden truck? It couldn’t handle the haul.
14. What do you call a tree that’s always late? A procrastinatree.

Wood Jokes and Puns

1. Why did the wooden pen break up with the pencil? Because the pencil was always writing in cursive.
2. What do you call a tree that’s always energetic? A lively lumber.
3. Why did the wooden giraffe break up with the wooden elephant? It was a tall order.
4. What do you call a tree that’s always keeping secrets? A confi-dendron.
5. Why did the wooden dog break up with the wooden cat? It was a clawful relationship.
6. What do you call a tree that’s always cooking? A culinary cedar.
7. Why did the wooden phone break up with the wooden laptop? It had some connectivity issues.
8. What do you call a tree that’s always driving fast? A speed-willow.
9. Why did the wooden chair go to the tailor? To get a new seat cover.
10. What do you call a tree that’s always giving gifts? A present-wood.
11. Why did the wooden clock go to the therapist? It had some tick-tock issues.
12. What do you call a tree that’s always traveling? A wandering willow.
13. Why did the wooden baseball bat go to the gym? To improve its swing.
14. What do you call a tree that’s always calm? A tranquility pine.

Final Take Away from these Funny Wood Jokes

The above 70 hilarious Wood jokes and puns are sure to make any gathering of friends, family members, or colleagues erupt with laughter.

I am sure these jokes and puns must have lightened your mood and also have brought some humor to your life.

Also don’t forget to check our other list of jokes.